I was deeply touched by this land. So many landscapes. So many heartful people. The feeling here was like an ethereal timelessness, slow motion almost...pulling me back while I reconciled with an outer world which demanded from me more than I was able to give. I suppose sometimes we're guided to disappoint. Face to face with the disapproval and judgment I have always feared, I broke through and was able to love myself more deeply in it's presence. My heart broke too. Sometimes change sails forth from our horizons and comes to take us with it, not everyone is coming. I learnt alot, came back more changed than I expected. divinely, the vision became clearer. I am grateful for it all. This island was a river flowing effortlessly. All sought is found. Heaven is now. And all is unfolding. Mahalo Hawaii, I will return.
Hands to the earth
I surrender to the sun, the dirt, the moon, the water
my life force.
Lead me through this benevolent darkness
bless me with the clarity to see,
the power of this sadness.
the courage to walk with graceful honesty,
this is the remedy.
All things are only ever temporary
in this blessed, fleeting life
although moments feel so all encompassing as they are lived.
I am healing and releasing fears I didn't even know I had
I am allowing
no longer trying
and though the pain may be more present
and although I feel as though time is at a standstill
I know that this is good for these are powerful times of change
I - the intermediary between my fear
and my faith.
to the heartbeat which feels so much
which panics and aches and loves and furies
but beats on nonetheless.
so here I am, at yet another crossroads
But there is no decision to be made.
Only a knowing, forever unfolding.
A pack of wolves circles in the darkness of my psyche,
I feel the eyes of others, watching from the shadows ~
judgment feels so heavy...
and yet it is such strong medicine.
I am forced to strengthen in my truth
soften in my perceptions
grow in acceptance
first of myself...then of the world.
and the tears that come will cleanse me.
Call it a coming of age.
In contrast, I see those with gentle eyes, space holders ~
Illuminated are the deep allies of my heart.
I am seeing with a clearer vision who 'I Am'.
and "judgment" bears this gift...
twisted, but true. Gifts in strange packages are still gifts.
I'll take my dose,
and give thanks for the healing.